Apple’s Siri 2.0 Is Destined to Fail-Here’s Why You Shouldn’t Get Hyped
Hello everyone. So, gather around, because Apple’s at it again-polishing the same old engine and slapping on an AI turbocharger, all while smiling that smug Cupertino smile. The fanfare this time? Siri is allegedly going to be “supercharged” in iOS 18 alongside the shiny, liquid-glass design language of the iPhone 16 Pro. Because heaven forbid we can just have functional innovation without distraction by animated pastel blobs.
Siri: The Legacy of Mediocrity
Let’s be clear. Siri has been the digital equivalent of an unreliable roommate for almost 15 years-sometimes setting your alarm, other times staring at you blankly while mumbling “Here’s what I found on the web.” The backend “brain” has degraded to the point where I’m surprised it even remembers its own name. Apple wasn’t first to speech assistants, but when they bought Siri, they aimed higher than anyone else. And look at them now-on the back foot, desperately trying to catch up to Google, Amazon, and the rising AI tide heading straight for their walled garden.
The “New” Supercharged Siri
Enter the allegedly revolutionary Siri, now powered by “AI” (because of course it is-slap AI on something and watch the stock price twitch). With this upgrade, you’ll supposedly be able to bark at your phone to edit a photo, add things to your cart, comment on Instagram, or log into services without touching a screen. Essentially, Siri could operate apps like a full-on proxy human, minus the part where it sighs when you ask for the 15th time how to spell “conscientious.”
This is Apple reaching for its Star Trek fantasy of a universal voice computer-and daring you to dream along.
It’s an ambitious goal-after all, Apple envisions this working not just on iPhones and iPads, but on everything: Macs, Watches, Apple TV, HomePod. Anywhere you can’t or don’t want to touch the screen, Siri will obediently hop in. Great in theory. In execution? Let’s just say as a doctor, I’ve seen patients with better motor control than current-generation voice assistants.
The Potential and the Pitfalls
The vision here isn’t small-this overhaul is Apple’s ticket to becoming king of the AI mountain, if they pull it off. But even Apple’s insiders are worried. First, there’s the whole accuracy thing. Imagine telling Siri to transfer some money and it accidentally sends your rent to a random Etsy candle shop. Or asking it to pull up your ECG data and getting TikTok dance tutorials instead. Precision in high-stakes apps like health and banking isn’t just important-it’s the difference between trust and torch pitchforks outside Apple Park.
Behind the glossy ads, Gurman’s sources admit the engineers are fighting to make this even work on a “sufficient number” of apps. That “first try” success Apple adores in its marketing? In reality, it’s going to require an empire of developer buy-in and probably a legion of QA testers working overtime. And if Apple rolls this out in a hype wave only for Siri to faceplant? The exodus to OpenAI’s assistant or some Jony Ive-meets-AI fever dream will be swift and merciless.
A Decade of Voice Assistant Failure
Let’s not sugarcoat it: Amazon, Google, Apple-they’ve all failed to make voice assistants indispensable beyond a glorified egg timer. The moment tasks get specific or context-heavy, the magic dies. Google’s literally dialing back Assistant’s smart home control because it’s gotten so unreliable. Amazon axed dozens of Alexa initiatives because it was bleeding cash. Apple now hopes this AI overhaul will finally fulfill the promise they failed on for over a decade.
The Verdict
Here’s the harsh prognosis from Dr. Su’s desk: This is technically exciting, but execution is a minefield. If Apple delivers on their claims, Siri’s transformation could genuinely push them ahead in the AI race. But history-and Siri’s own anaemic track record-screams caution. The next 12 months will make or break this reboot, and Apple can’t just style their way out of another flop. Because if Siri’s still the same old voice in a shinier package, then this isn’t innovation-it’s just another round of “We promise it works this time” snake oil.
My diagnosis? Optimistic curiosity, tempered by years of tech industry déjà vu. I’ll believe it when my iPhone can confidently navigate my bank app without the digital equivalent of a seizure. Until then, we’re in Schrödinger’s Siri-alive in the demo reel, probably dead in real-world use.
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is entirely my opinion.
Article source: Apple Is Betting Everything on a Voice-Controlled AI Siri, https://gizmodo.com/apple-is-betting-everything-on-a-voice-controlled-ai-siri-2000641286
